Is the thought of your first date making you nervous? Most of you might not have any ideas about what to do on a first date. If so, you are not alone. Even in the age of Tinder and Match.com, few people find dating simple and uncomplicated. So, I thought of giving you some first date tips to help you have a successful first date experience.
The fundamental thing is that you need to avoid the more common mistakes and fears by using the right approaches and strategies. Going on a date will be something to hope for rather than something to fear.
Tips for First Date
So, here are my top 18 first date tips that will help you be cool, relaxed, and confident on your first date. These first date tips cover what to do on a first date and what not to. Follow these tips to have a fantastic first dating experience. I know some of you may not like living by rules and guidelines. Still, these are great first date ideas for both men and women. Just consider it as a few suggestions from a friend who had a bad first date but learned a lot from it and corrected the next time.
Don’t complicate things
You may be tense, anxious, and full of uncertainty while dating for the first time (always for some), especially with someone you know little about. So don’t complicate things by trying to make it a perfectly planned romantic date or a whole day outing. Let it be simple by taking it as an opportunity to get to know each other more in a casual way.
The more relaxed you feel the more comfortable your date will be. Sitting at a right angle to your date rather than directly facing them is a simple trick.
Choose the ideal first date location
On your first date, I wouldn’t recommend going somewhere too fancy or loud, or a place where you can’t have a conversation. The purpose of the first date is to see how well you and your date get along. Therefore, open talks really matter. Find a place that is casual where you can easily vibe with each other.
Consider meeting up at a coffee shop or grabbing a drink somewhere relaxing to start the conversation. You can think of moving on to dinner if you feel you want to spend more time together.
Prepare some first date topics
Going on a first date without preparing some topics can be a bad idea sometimes. You are meeting a person you know little or nothing about. So it would be helpful if you could prepare in advance.
Plan a few interesting first date questions and some impressive answers to the questions that may come your way. It’s totally fine to ask about their favourite books, food, movies, travel stories, free-time activities, etc. Make sure the other person is comfortable with your questions. Don’t make it a questionnaire session.
Remember to avoid sensitive topics like their previous relationships, sex, or how much they earn. Listen intelligently and respond sensibly.
Boost your confidence
Most of us enjoy being around confident people. Body language is a powerful indicator that can reveal a lot about you to your date. To feel more confident, do some ‘power posing’ ahead of time. Practice some assertive postures to boost your confidence in advance. But don’t try to overdo things; that will make you look ridiculous.
First date impression counts
The first impression is the best impression. You may have heard, “You only get one chance to make a first impression.” You need to make a strong impression on your first date. This is one of the important first date tips because it only takes a few minutes for someone to form an impression of us. You can choose your own tried and proven ways to make a strong first impression.
Keep a happy, smiling face, give a positive demeanour; and above all, let them feel better with you.
There is no doubt that you should wear something comfortable, but since it is your first date, I recommend you make an effort to make it memorable. It would be great if you could check the dress code and ambience of your date location. I am not giving any kind of specific outfit recommendations for you. Whatever you choose to wear, make sure you are at ease.
Aware of your body language
Your body language can tell a lot about you. Making proper eye contact, positive behaviour, assertive postures, engaging conversation, and smiling all convey a sense of confidence and involvement in the conversation. Crossing your arms, keeping your eyes down, gazing around the room, and other similar actions can make you appear nervous or bored.
It is a bad signal to check your phone constantly, messaging often to others, or scroll through social media amidst the conversation. It’s really annoying. Keep your phone away, put it in your purse or pocket, and try not to glance at it unless you absolutely have to.
A genuine compliment is what both men and women would love to hear. But don’t overdo that because giving too many compliments and praises can make them awkward and uncomfortable. Congratulate your date on something other than their appearances, such as their laugh, sense of humour, intelligence, or musical taste.
Watch your Language
Watching your language is one of the main first date tips because it can seriously impact your relationship further. I know we all don’t use abusive or derogatory words on our dates. But you are not supposed to speak negatively either. Criticising or complaining about other people, yourself, or your own life is something that can divulge a lot about your character and sense of self-worth. I am asking you not to be fake; rather, focus on positive talk and create a cheerful attitude on your first date.
Keep a two-way conversation
Sure, you all have that thought of talking about yourself; your interests, likes and dislikes, preferences, etc. But make sure that you give them time and space to talk about their interests, successes, and what matters to them. Otherwise, it will be a one-way boring conversation that your date may want to end soon.
Careful of touch
Do you have the thought that touching them on your first date can give them a feeling of intimacy? Don’t dare do that, unless it is very natural, casual, friendly, and warm. According to relationship experts, these touches can give the other person an impression that you’re super-touchy even on your first date. So be mindful when touching, because overdoing it is really weird.
There is no rule that you shouldn’t touch or kiss on your first date; if the chemistry is there and the moment is right, why not? A warm touch or kiss is a great way to know if a date went well.
Safety is crucial
Always consider your safety in the first place. You may not have a very good idea about the person you are going to date for the first time. A public place like a coffee shop or park would be better, as others can see you. If you are confused or fearsome, share your location with your best buddy so that they can check in and see where you are if you don’t respond by a particular time.
Unless you’ve established trust with the person you’re going on a date with, don’t allow them to pick you up or drop you off at your place. Let a random online friend have no idea about where you live. I’m not trying to scare you—all I want for you is to stay safe out there!
Go dutch if your date insists
Though this is an important first date tip, you have to deal with this situation properly. It’s always nice to offer to treat your date. But if he/she insists on splitting the bill, be open to going Dutch. Allow them to set the boundaries that make them feel comfortable.
Don’t expect a romance or love at first sight
Don’t expect your first date to be a love at first sight or mind-blowing session. You don’t have to be overly concerned about making your first date an impossibly good first impression. So, let your first date feel natural and comfortable. If you both enjoy the first date, you will definitely feel the desire to go on another date.
Having a preconceived idea about how your date should go will not help you to make it well.
Don’t ignore early signs of danger
When you start to like someone, you may fail to notice the possible risks or dangers. Consider this the best time to learn more about them. Noticing the warning signals in the early stages is always a great way to decide what to do next. It could be anything like interrupting you too often during a conversation, using berating language, or crossing your physical or emotional limits. Make sure you take the necessary action to keep yourself safe no matter what. You don’t have to put up with anything, okay?
True to Yourself
This is one of the most crucial first date tips I wish to give you- Be yourself and true to yourself. Going on a first date can make you nervous, confused, or overly conscious. But it is not about winning or losing. The truth is that everyone is not for you and you are not for everyone. Go with this mindset and be true to yourself. So don’t try to be someone else; you don’t have to pretend for a random person from the internet.
Though this one doesn’t come straight under the first date tips, it has everything to do with your further plans. It is always nice to check in after the date and thank the other person for spending time with you. So, what if you felt a good connection, a lot of things in common, and a spark between you? Keep moving forward. But if your first date didn’t go well, don’t agree to a second date.
Your first date went wrong?
Keep in mind that your first date isn’t everything. If your first date didn’t go as planned but there was some spark, you never know what can happen a second time. Therefore, I will suggest you give it another try; you may feel more comfortable with each other, reducing stress and making the date more enjoyable.
Things to avoid next time
So, you might have got a clear idea about what to do on a first date, now you have to take a look at some things you need to avoid on your date next time.
The most common mistake that happens on a first date is lack of communication. So, my advice is to approach your first date with an open mind. Communicate properly because an effective relationship requires clear communication.
You may have planned every element for an unforgettable date, but always be prepared to go with the flow. It’s crucial to be with someone who is relaxed enough if the plan changes!
Leave your expectations at the door — having a predefined plan of how the date should go will not help you. Enjoy your date with an open mind.
I hope the above first date tips can help you handle your first date without losing yourself. Whether you have decided to go on a second date or not, give it a thought about what went well, what changes you need to make on your next date, etc. Ask these questions to yourself to make your dating journey successful. All the best!
You might also like to read, Important Open Relationship Rules.