Trying to get over a breakup? You are not alone. Experts say that 1-in-3 around us are struggling to pull through a breakup. Relationships break up for several reasons. It may not be your or their fault. Nobody is to blame; things just didn’t work out.
No matter whatever the reason is, a relationship breakup is always hard to get through. A breakup experience may not be the same for all. While you feel angry, some others may feel sad, lonely, guilty, rejected, devastated or even commit suicide. It’s okay to feel low after a breakup, only time can heal your pain and loss. During the breakup phase, you may think your life has turned upside down and it will never be okay again. I know advice and suggestions cannot recuperate your loss. Only you know the pain, no one else. But this is your life and you have to get up and live for yourself. When you decide to spoil your life thinking over the split-up, you are losing yourself.
A once heartbroken, confused, ruptured, and completely numb me is sharing with you some important tips for you to recover after a breakup. To deal with a breakup, you must find means that can ease the recovery from the fallen relationship. I know it may take a bit of time, but you can do a lot of things to take your life back in full swing.
Things that Help You After a Breakup
Before getting into all those recovery tips, first, make up your mind that this breakup is a preamble to a new and better life that you are going to find something more exciting and compatible. You have all the right to be inconsolable, but eventually, you need to move forward with high spirit.
Give Yourself Time to Grieve
No matter who initiated the breakup or what the reasons were, you are going through tough times and you need time to process this separation. You have lost a big part of your life. Your routine has probably been around him/her. Getting over from that daily course is a bit difficult, so allow yourself some time to grieve. But remember, this anguish and yelling is not forever. This is just until you settle down accepting the loss.
Get engaged in anything that excites you. You might be feeling too lonely and having nothing to do. Those were the days of endless phone calls, chats, and love quotes. Now you have a lot of free time. Plan ahead and engage in things that can keep you busy. Be it reading, movie watching, music or anything, indulge in them and try to enjoy your days.
Rediscover & Reconnect Yourself
Breakups can shake us badly. Our sense of identity is connected with our relationships. Once it’s over, we fall into the feeling of loss and total devastation. To get over a breakup and move on, you need to rediscover yourself, comprehending the fact that your partner or influencer is no longer in your life. Return to the things you love doing, don’t squander your time recollecting those late night calls and rendezvous. Here, you need to indulge in activities that can help you become more of yourself.
Remember how you used to spend your weekends long before, the favourite sport you gave up, or the favourite food you were forbidden by your partner. Resume those activities your partner or relationship has been blocking and start over a new life that brings that positive vibes back.
Schedule Plans With Friends
Friends are one of the best options to distract ourselves from a breakup or emotional breakdowns. Make plans with your friends so you don’t get time to grieve over the loss. Book for a movie with your friends, plan a dinner date with your best friend or plan an outing to indulge in some joyful days.
If you used to reject your friends’ invitation to parties or movies while having your romantic relationship, take this time to retrieve those missed occasions. Remember, when you schedule a program, make sure that you’re inviting only those buddies who can make you feel pampered, re-energized and feel the best version of yourself. Don’t let yourself bruised, inviting that wicked groups.
Plan and Rebuild a Future without Them
It is quite natural to conceive a lot of dreams and future plans together when you are in a relationship. Those hopes, dreams, and future plans will definitely haunt you after your breakup because you are stuck in those dreams you envisioned and you know that you can no longer have that. To heal yourself, move on, and grip to a better future; find your own goals without your ex and think of a successful and colourful future for a better tomorrow.
Travel and Relish New Experience
Travel and explore new places to experience new things in life. There is much to learn from a solo trip. Your journeys don’t have to be luxurious ones. Start by switching up your daily trodden routes, trying out new restaurants, taking a deviation to the lush green parks from your hangout places and spots you didn’t hang out with your partner. Take yourself to parts of the city you have never been to and cherish every new moment without your ex.
Get Lost in Books
Books are a wonderful choice to help you escape from your current breakup thoughts and despair. Reading a good book will not just make you enlightened, it can make you relaxed giving you fewer chances to think of your grief. Get that one book you have been longing to read and head to a coffee shop or park. I would suggest not picking books that contain breakup stories or separation notes.
Focus on Fitness
A new workout regime can help you move forward from the current pain and distress. More than just physical exercise, starting workouts after the breakup will help you lift your mood, focus on your fitness, and stay healthy in your vulnerable time. Hit your nearest gym and start your workout today itself for a healthy life with a wholesome body and mind. Supplement your gym session with yoga practice or Zumba classes. Always remember some days you may not feel motivated for the gym, forgive yourself. Breakup sucks!
Food and Healing
Food has great healing power. Nourish your body with healthy and scrumptious food, and retrieve from the world of despair and desolation. Go out to your favourite restaurants or order in some different tastes to distract yourself from other despairing thoughts. But when you choose food as a way to get away from your breakup, don’t forget about your health and body. Adding excessive amounts of junk and sweets to your food to recover from the emotional blow is absolutely a bad idea. Treat yourself with healthy food otherwise, you may need to find something else to deal with the emotional toll of obesity.
Write it Down
Penning your feelings will enable you to get through the tough times of your breakup easily. Write about your thoughts and feelings regarding the previous relationship to realize it’s time to move on, focus on the positive aspects, and find the silver lining in what you had. Pouring your emotions into writing will help you pull out the suffocation inside you and feel relaxed for easier healing. Recognise the good attributes of your relationship and decide to step forward.
Consider Consulting a Therapist
If you feel your mental health is deeply affected and find it difficult to recover from the breakup, consider consulting a therapist who is unbiased and experienced in dealing with emotional breakdowns. A good therapist can guide you to move on from the current confusions and restlessness. Experts suggest consulting a therapist for those who are experiencing a significant decline in functioning, change in personality, struggling at sleep and work, and suicidal thoughts. It will also help you pursue future relationships in a stronger way.
Additional Tips to Recover a Split Up
- Distance yourself from the previous relationship.
- Mutual friends are priceless, but discussing your failed relationship with them can be hopeless and regressive.
- Careful not to bottle up your feelings. Holding back your feelings will backfire, ironically urging you to think about them more.
- Don’t stick to the past. That will let you down again.
- Put aside the heartbreaking reminders of your ex. Be it old texts, call recordings, tattoos, or anything, get rid of everything that restrains you from moving forward in your life without that person.
- Don’t rush into the next date too soon. When you are still yelling about your failed relationship, give yourself some more time for a new relationship.
- A strict no-no to checking on the social media profiles of your ex and analyzing their updates. That can only make you feel bad about yourself. So, better stay away from social media handles or feel free to block/unfriend them for your good mental health.
- Forgive yourself for what you did in your previous relationship. Let go of the grudges and ill feelings towards your ex so that you can eventually find a friendship if you both desire it.